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ONE-YEAR-OLD Olive Coate-Kibeiks is showered with loved.

She is the daughter of Alison Coate-Kibeiks and Bianca Prziovska-Kibeiks, one of several same-sex families in the south-west.

Living in Panmure for more than 10 years, the mothers are grateful for the support of their small community.

“We’ve been really lucky here,” Bianca said. 

“We haven’t experienced any sort of discrimination and I have very supportive colleagues,” Alison added. 

When Alison began teaching at Mortlake College a decade ago, she said it had been a lot different.

“We wouldn’t have been able to have Olive and it just wouldn’t have been the same. I was even advised not to tell my colleagues about Bianca when I started here and that hurt,” she said.  

“Then it gradually got out and it was just normality for the kids. It was no big deal.”

Although they have felt the effects of discrimination through bureaucracy and the media, both mothers are grateful for their communities’ acceptance. 

“At the end of the day, there has been no negativity and that makes me feel so fantastic,” Alison said. 

Yet despite the support, the couple find themselves frustrated by the lack of basic equality in government systems. 

“I just want to be able to have a wedding before I’m 50 so I can still fit into a wedding dress,” Alison said.

“And I don’t want to have to explain to Olive why everyone else is married but we’re not.”

Bianca and Alison have had to provide proof of parenthood, donor consent and their relationship as a couple just to apply for a birth certificate and Centrelink benefits. 

“It’s discrimination,” Bianca said. 

“We’re parents, like anybody else and we love our child like everybody else.”

The couple have been asked whether they will raise their child to be gay, who will be the father in the family and how they will combat future bullying. 

“People are just curious and that’s okay. Even that is something that’s changing. Kids will be bullied about the colour of their hair through to the marital status of their parents,” Alison said. 

“We’re going to raise Olive to be a good person, just like everyone else.” 

A unique dynamic, Alison’s Melbourne-based brother Michael, who is also in a same-sex relationship, was the sperm donor for Bianca. He and his partner, Nathan, take an active role in Olive’s life.

With the rate of same-sex couples having children growing in Australia, Alison and Bianca want basic equality, sooner rather than later. 

“We’re not trailblazers and young people are more confident to come out than ever,” Alison said.

“I guess we want people to see that it is possible to have a family and be accepted without question.

“It’s about role-modelling normality.”