One of them is my pommy mate, The Mattress (his name sounds similar to a brand name of this particular product).

He has one of those cheeky grins and sarcastic styles of speech that brings out the maternal instinct in The Lioness but gives me an almighty dose of the Edgars.

Like the other day when he asked me “What’s happened to Australian sport; you used to win everything”.

This from a bloke whose country’s biggest achievement – until they cheated us out of the 2003 Rugby Union World Cup -  was Bucks Fizz winning the Eurovision Song Contest in 1981.

And at the last world cup they couldn’t make the quarter-finals – the first host nation to win that awful record.

But then they came back and beat us 3-0 in a test series.

And now they are even giving it to us in the Olympics.

What has happened to our swimmers, track stars and even our equestrian mob? These are sports that Australians were supposedly born to rule.

And for how long do us long suffering Australian supporters have to take the smarmy attitude of the All Blacks supporter.

Even when they do get beaten they always seem to be able to take some solace in the fact some other country always seems to beat us at the same time.

But perhaps that shows where we’ve gone wrong – except in female sport, where the girls always represent us with great pride and courage.

The All Blacks are simply more manly, masculine and smarter than the pampered poseurs currently representing our national rugby union team.

It’s okay for the Kangaroos, they don’t really play an international sport. Yeah, I know they are playing in a four nation tournament at the moment but Scotland? You’ve got to be kidding me.

And we are never going to have any sort of international Aussie Rules competition.

So what has bought on this introspective? It shouldn’t be hard to work out.

Our supposed national cricket team of course. Not long ago we were number one in just about all forms of the game.

And then we’re flogged by Sri Lanka, thrashed in South Africa and are now staring down a 3-0 whitewash. It’s not the fact we are losing, it’s how we’re losing that bugs me.

Has anyone seen a more gormless display than that handed in by the Aussies in the last test match, one so totally lacking in ticker and commitment?

I personally blame the amount of money the top level sportsmen are paid to support their over-inflated egos.

And yes, some of the behaviour of these so-called role models is nothing short of disgusting.

Somehow sport has become an undesirable commodity within our community. But why?

Team sport is all about coming together with your teammates, working hard and learning to use discipline to defeat your noble and worthy opponents. However these days Australian society seems to be more about lowering the bar rather than raising it and having our children strive for excellence.

But like that funny looking character in Star Wars said: “Do. Or do not. There is no try”.

So come on Aussies, let’s drink a bucket of cement and harden up.