AT: I heard an interesting whisper this week about former gun full-forward Chris Fleming. Apparently the Silver Fox has been doing some home improvement work but things may not have gone 100 per cent according to plan. Big Flem decided to build a structure/shed and got a few blokes around to give him a hand.
TA: This sounds like a recipe for disaster.
AT: Flem has been known to have a punt and I understand there may have been some short cuts taken in the planning phase of building the structure. The boys got to work and the first wall was well on the way when there was a query from a much more knowledgeable soul that Big Flem about whether the structure was as sound as it could be. The big fella had no doubt it would all finish up being all right but unfortunately when the last bit of tin was tacked on the first wall the structure got a bit tired and decided to have a lie down.
TA: Just before you start poking fun at others I have heard that your own home improvement works have been far from trouble free in the past.
AT: Don't know what you are talking about.
TA: The Bride has mentioned that you built a fence that didn't last too long - hours in fact - and your current back fence has a lean well away from the vertical.
AT: It would be a bit boring if everything was straight up and down, Tim. Could be interesting if I go and give Flem a hand. Talking of outbuildings a former Warrnambool detective had some unwanted young visitors to his garage this week who helped themselves to some alcohol. The former detective is now taking much more care with his home security and it was fortunate that his luxury car, which had the keys in it, didn't go for a drive. A word of advice to juvenile crooks - best not to nick stuff from former cops. The culprits have apparently been apprehended.
TA: Former Warrnambool premiership player David "Butch" Cassidy wants a new nickname. Apparently Butch has a little dinghy which he takes out fishing. Last week he recruited former Fitzroy legend Mark "Smurky" Dwyer and the burly Stephen Rhook for a spot of fishing about 10 kilometres off Killarney. Butch instructed Smurky and Rhookie that before they got on the dinghy that had to call him Skipper.
AT: It sounds a bit like the old TV show Gilligan's Island.
TA: The Skipper and his crew were having a quiet run until Smurky landed a 20kg gummy shark. Fortunately the Skipper was able to give full instructions about landing the big fish.
AT: A 20kg shark would take up a fair bit of room in a dinghy. The craft must be bigger than a dinghy.
TA: Don't ruin a good story. After the shark was on board, the Skipper and Smurky started catching snapper - 20 of them - all good sizes, but Rhookie was catching like a Pakistani wicketkeeper. The boys decided to stay out until Rhookie caught a fish.
AT: I hear it took another four hours for the boys to head back in after Rhookie managed a tiddler.
TA: American Nascar champion Tony Stewart made a rushed trip to the south-west two weeks ago. Stewart had been holidaying up in Sydney and had heard a lot about the Twelve Apostles so he decided to fly his own jet down for the day to have a look around. I suppose you'll be heading out to the Speedway next week with the rest of the petrol heads.
AT: I'll be track-side for the couple of nights. It's great entertainment. What will you be doing?
TA: I'll be heading up to AquaZone to see the new budding swimming stars. More than 650 entries have been received for a three-day carnival. Warrnambool Swimming Club has 39 entrants. We just hope they can win a few races but they face still opposition from competitors across the state.
AT: Great to see Norm Smith medallist Byron Pickett signing up with the Sharks. I hear the club is trying to get about 20 people a week to chip in for match payments. It's a great initiative by the Deakin University team. Any news from the street?
TA: The main rumour relates to a couple of the boys at Materia's fruit shop. Simon Crisp and Mario Materia are in serious training to compete in this year's Melbourne to Warrnambool bike race. Simon was the first local to finish a few years ago. Sources say Mario does not have many clues but he's working at it. Apparently, the boys are putting in the yards by getting up in the early hours before going to work. Neville Brodie is offering plenty of advice.
AT: Couple of people on the sick list we need to mention. Regular racegoer Lyle Hussey and local football guru Ian Amoore have had their share of health problems and we wish them all the best. Until next week hooroo.
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